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Post by Craig Christ on Feb 4, 2008 10:51:42 GMT -5
And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone I ask no one
And my ties are severed clean Less I have the more I gain Off the beaten path I reign
Anywhere I roam Where I lay my head is home YE' YEAH
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Exodus
Lower Midcarder
A mystery wrapped within an enigma
Posts: 112
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Post by Exodus on Feb 4, 2008 12:49:09 GMT -5
Such fitting lyrics for a song since the Earth shall indeed become my throne starting tonight!
OOC: I guess this is the place to ask this since this is for the card. I post my rp, well promo, in the promo thread, correct? And also, what is the usual format for promos, I figure you all will use similar methods since you seem to know each other? I just want to make sure I know what I'm getting into, lol.
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Post by Eric Ares on Feb 4, 2008 13:03:06 GMT -5
Colt Comrade!
Your making me face a commie in my very first match. I'll bring him down faster than the Berlin wall fell to good ole Capitalism.
....wait his name is Conrad?
Meh, probably still a commie.
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Post by Deacon King on Feb 4, 2008 14:57:29 GMT -5
IC:
And I almost was forgotten.
I mean, they tried to leave me off the card!
Seems like a desperate attempt at keeping me from takin' over this show.
Cause you know... Rock Stars can do that.
The only law above us is the Lord... and he's still rockin' out to the cd I burned him.
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Austin
Lower Midcarder
Posts: 172
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Post by Austin on Feb 4, 2008 15:29:01 GMT -5
Exodus, your so-called throne is about to get a little Radical.
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13
Developmental Talent
Posts: 38
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Post by 13 on Feb 4, 2008 16:03:05 GMT -5
Soon all the pain and torture will begin. Soon me and my asscociate will begin our domination.
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RaTo
Developmental Talent
Posts: 40
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Post by RaTo on Feb 4, 2008 16:17:34 GMT -5
So let me get it straight: it's Gregory Best vs Rivers Atwood at 1.1?
No, let me rephrase that: its Gregory Best, the druken bastard who can't do a single wrestling move with the exception of perhaps a sloppy DDT, versus River Atwood, the guy who appears to be a technical wrestling genius and all around boy wonder?!
Well, I'm dead...
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Post by iscariot on Feb 4, 2008 17:18:50 GMT -5
Nice, I'm gonna fight a guy who's only chance to fulfill his dreams is to to become champion, to defeat everyone and overcome everything, all that just for the right to marry to woman he loves!
I always had a little soft spot for just causes and stories of true love! It's a shame I'll have to stand in the way of your dreams... Well then, let's think ahead shall we?
When I get tired of being champion I'll forfeit the title to you, does that sound like a deal?
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Post by Erich Ahriman on Feb 4, 2008 17:20:59 GMT -5
OOC: Eric h Ahr iman vs Anon Emus
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Mr. Thomas Hookton
Lower Midcarder
If Heaven Rides Against Us, Then Gods Be Damned
Posts: 117
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Post by Mr. Thomas Hookton on Feb 4, 2008 20:41:30 GMT -5
OOC: Anonymous Emus!? Holy Crap run and hide. Emu's that refuse to tell you their name are the worst, and most dangerous!
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Rivers
Developmental Talent
Posts: 12
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Post by Rivers on Feb 4, 2008 21:17:59 GMT -5
So let me get it straight: it's Gregory Best vs Rivers Atwood at 1.1? No, let me rephrase that: its Gregory Best, the druken bastard who can't do a single wrestling move with the exception of perhaps a sloppy DDT, versus River Atwood, the guy who appears to be a technical wrestling genius and all around boy wonder?! Well, I'm dead... I wish you the best of luck Greg, may the best man win.
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Post by Mike Forrest on Feb 4, 2008 22:11:08 GMT -5
Mitchell is seen pacing around in the back of Colts Winnebago as the scene opens. Being a midget he cant reach the cabinets to grab a glass and he looks pissed.
Mitchell: Colt come here, i need a glass for my scotch.
Colt, the behemoth mass he is, lumbers over to help mitchell.
Colt: Boss should you really drink before driving? Isnt that bad?.
Mitchell looks at Colt annoyed.
Mitchell. Colt, i appreciate the concern but just gimme the glass and go finish coloring.
Colts eyes light up as he remembers the coloring book. He grabs the cup and promptly sits the midget on the counter and gallops off.
Mitchell: Asshole.
He pulls out the scotch and pours himself a glass. He sips it then pulls out his phone. He dials information.
Mitchell: Hi i need the number for Eric Ares please.
He gets the number and hangs up and dials it.
Hi you have reached Eric Ares. I am not able to come to the phone right now, probobly because i am boning some fine ass bitch or doing something close to that relative awsomeness. If this is an ex girlfriend dont bother leaving a message. I dont care if you have my baby, You deal with it. Anyone else leave a message and il get back to you if i feel you warrent my attention. BEEP.
Mitchell: Hello this is a representative of Colt Conrads, a man who you recently slandered. I would just like to inform you that he is not, nor has he ever been a member of the communist party. Also if you continue to slander him i assure you there we will seek legal repercussions. good day sir.
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Cain Ravid
Lower Midcarder
"Not so; if anyone kills Cain, he will suffer vengeance seven times over."
Posts: 106
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Post by Cain Ravid on Feb 4, 2008 22:29:56 GMT -5
Tick Tock....Tick Tock...
One do-gooder's time has almost run out...
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Post by Eric Ares on Feb 4, 2008 23:00:29 GMT -5
Eric Ares finally finishes his marathon of sex with your mom, your sister, and that hot aunt even you wish you could screw you sick freak and finally checks his messages.
He shakes his head sadly before hanging up.
"Used to be a day communists took pride in themselves. Now they are as much a closet case society as the gays....except they don't throw nearly as great a party.
Ah well, at least Colt Stalin doesn't have any pride. Losing to me won't do much to him."
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Post by Mike Forrest on Feb 4, 2008 23:11:15 GMT -5
OOC: lol
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Post by Super 'Mella Bear on Feb 5, 2008 9:37:45 GMT -5
OOC: Anonymous Emus!? Holy Crap run and hide. Emu's that refuse to tell you their name are the worst, and most dangerous! OOC: LOL! Fuckin' Jay! Now I have to add an 'H' to the last name.
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Mr. Thomas Hookton
Lower Midcarder
If Heaven Rides Against Us, Then Gods Be Damned
Posts: 117
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Post by Mr. Thomas Hookton on Feb 5, 2008 9:41:08 GMT -5
OOC: I do my best, I was just going to go for the general joke, but I saw Emus as a stand alone and had to go for it, off the collar banter is my forte
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RaTo
Developmental Talent
Posts: 40
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Post by RaTo on Feb 5, 2008 18:19:30 GMT -5
I wish you the best of luck Greg, may the best man win. Cheers to that! Its quite difficult finding such a gentleman in these here days so good for you, lad! Now, I just hope your trainers taught you to brawl, 'cause kickin' and puchin' is all I got!
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Post by Mortus on Feb 5, 2008 19:00:12 GMT -5
Motherfuckin'-shit-face-yeah!
Fuckin' MAIN-TWAT-TICKLING-EVENT Mr. Cock-shine-Ares.
I think I may watch your match just after I roll on in to the venue. Just for shits.
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Post by Eric Ares on Feb 5, 2008 20:13:00 GMT -5
Figures they'd need to put four of you retards in the ring together to keep it remotely interesting.
Don't worry, one of these days they'll let you in that Main Event means can't cut it without a bum buddy backing you up.
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Post by Mortus on Feb 5, 2008 20:20:50 GMT -5
Jealousy doesn't suit you...
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Post by Eric Ares on Feb 5, 2008 20:22:18 GMT -5
Nope.
Hard to be jealous when I have an easy step to the second round and you have to deal with the fact that everyone in your match has more balls than you.
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Apathy
Developmental Talent
Posts: 8
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Post by Apathy on Feb 5, 2008 20:25:30 GMT -5
Inhale
Exhale
Inhale
Exhale
Curiouser and curiouser. So much life. So much to live for.
..so much to lose.
Broken. Unwanted. Irrelevant.
Yep. Sounds about right.
Inhale
Exhale
Inhale
Exhale
You know, if I were a caring man, I'd state that this piece of shit card is over-saturated. Of course, witless and..what's the word I'm searching for? Emasculated? That will fit I suppose. Witless and emasculated though you all are, just for shits and giggles I suppose that you're supposed to be kings of your courts.
So come on, boys...
Hit me...once more..with FEELING.
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Post by Mortus on Feb 5, 2008 20:44:13 GMT -5
Fucks sake, do you shit a whole bunch of cock-gaping-horse-wank-kiddy-fuck-broken-condom-esque-useless-goatse-wide-long-ass-words or what?
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Apathy
Developmental Talent
Posts: 8
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Post by Apathy on Feb 5, 2008 20:50:45 GMT -5
Useless? Christ, the cow polks back near "home sweet home" have more continuity in the English language then you do.
And with a sliver more style I'd wager. Though your inquiry, like much about this rancid fucking cess pool, is irrelevant. And giving you a banal, rudimentary, simplified dialect to adhere to your blatant banality would only be me adhering to the status quo of the rancid fester cyst that you call your "humanity". If you can even call the bacterial, viral existence you possess human.
You've caught me yawning, boy. And though you've probably been entertained by this, I won't be wasting my time with you anymore.
Go on, boy. Get.
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Post by Mortus on Feb 5, 2008 21:08:00 GMT -5
Oh deary-fucking-me.
It strikes me that your entire fucking existence is a tad on the 'irrelevant' side.
You see, skipper, it's fairly simple, your so proclaimed 'transcendence' of 'mortality' has left you a few degrees north of your local EMOtive rock group.
And though I high doubt it's as entertaining to yourself to sit and practice in a garage for extended periods of time on the next crop-of-bukkake-bullshit you're planning to say the next day until you've got it down to a T...
No; not as much fun as the EMOtive rockers are having rasping 'Stab My Heart, I'm Bleeding-FUCKING-Black because I Love you,' over and over and over until the very same, but much more simplified and rhythmic rendition of your pathetic life story can be sufficiently performed whilst the lead guitarist gets his tongue ring caught on the bass players Prince Albert.
Where was I?
Ah yes. All that pretty shit out there you just said, mate. It's a shame, I'm sure it sounded lovely, I'm sure it made you feel all deep and shit. Absolution is so definitely the way forward and whatever fuck-er-ies you want to believe. But my point, despite comparing you to the flaming-fudge-fondling-faggots that practice down the road is thus.
Normal people don't fucking talk like that ever. That shit goes over peoples heads due to sheer and utter boredom inducing pointlessness of it all.
A simple 'Fuck off' would no doubt have been more than enough for most of your lifes problems, but no. You had to be the lovechild of a goddamn parrot and a fucking sleazy Oxford Dictionary, didn't you?
Fucking wank-hole.
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Cain Ravid
Lower Midcarder
"Not so; if anyone kills Cain, he will suffer vengeance seven times over."
Posts: 106
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Post by Cain Ravid on Feb 5, 2008 21:46:20 GMT -5
I find that ironic coming from you...seeing as how that statement seems to pretty much sum up yourself.
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Post by Eric Ares on Feb 5, 2008 22:05:01 GMT -5
So we have a man with no testicles, and another with asthma. What kind of fucking physical does this place use to test it's employees.
For shame people, if that guy is inhaling and exhaling all over the ring we are going to have all those smarks up our asses about lack of work rate and talent.
If this is the best we can put up, you want...no you NEED me to become champion. Yes, I am an ass to those of you not my equal, read all of you. But I can make anyone look like a god when they wrestle me.
Yes, even you dickless wonder, don't get your crotchless panties in a bunch.
Having myself as champion will only make the rest of you look better.
So when you enter that tournament, keep only thought in mind. Eric Ares for Vendetta World Champion in 2008.
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Apathy
Developmental Talent
Posts: 8
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Post by Apathy on Feb 5, 2008 22:34:25 GMT -5
Oh deary-fucking-me.
It strikes me that your entire fucking existence is a tad on the 'irrelevant' side.
You see, skipper, it's fairly simple, your so proclaimed 'transcendence' of 'mortality' has left you a few degrees north of your local EMOtive rock group.
And though I high doubt it's as entertaining to yourself to sit and practice in a garage for extended periods of time on the next crop-of-bukkake-bullshit you're planning to say the next day until you've got it down to a T...
No; not as much fun as the EMOtive rockers are having rasping 'Stab My Heart, I'm Bleeding-FUCKING-Black because I Love you,' over and over and over until the very same, but much more simplified and rhythmic rendition of your pathetic life story can be sufficiently performed whilst the lead guitarist gets his tongue ring caught on the bass players Prince Albert.
Where was I?
Ah yes. All that pretty shit out there you just said, mate. It's a shame, I'm sure it sounded lovely, I'm sure it made you feel all deep and shit. Absolution is so definitely the way forward and whatever fuck-er-ies you want to believe. But my point, despite comparing you to the flaming-fudge-fondling-faggots that practice down the road is thus.
Normal people don't fucking talk like that ever. That shit goes over peoples heads due to sheer and utter boredom inducing pointlessness of it all.
A simple 'Fuck off' would no doubt have been more than enough for most of your lifes problems, but no. You had to be the lovechild of a goddamn parrot and a fucking sleazy Oxford Dictionary, didn't you?
Fucking wank-hole. Alice: Could ya'll please forgive him? He wasn't raised right. His daddy.. Apathy (interjecting): If you were under the predisposition that you were to be seen as well as heard, you were sadly mistaken, bitch. You're there to fufill my basic desires and needs. As of right now, I don't need to fuck as my nuts have run about as dry as the arid, vapid space between this young buck's ears and your cunny is as loose as Dubbah-u's exit strategy from Iraq. To add to that, I'm quite content with the sub-par grilled chicken that you made me before we got here. Now be a good little girl and fetch daddy a chair. See he's going to tell these kind folk a story. So I lied. I suppose I will respond..but not in the manner you would think. I'm not normal, boy. Abnormal..atypical..unique..queer..just words that pretty much sum up that I will always be set apart from the boring, droll stupor that you like to wade in. So with all of your knowledge on what emotion is, it is quite obvious that bathing in your own fecal matter is a fate you'd like to share with the masses. Quite frankly, I wouldn't give a fuck less if you were entertained by me or not. Your opinions and your delusions of grandeur aren't to be taken seriously as any man juxtaposed between subjacent cinema figures of the science fiction genre telling me where I stand in the world tickles me shitless. Go on, Little Boy Blue. Blow on your horn with petty, trivial insults laced with underlying homosexuality and blatant social insecurity as your notes. Copulate and multiply, Breeder. Give yer boys a nice few pumps into the ether and stroke it at a nice medium pace. What's wrong? Don't appreciate the imagery? Too fucking bad. You should have thought of that before you opened your mouth while you were too busy fellating your own ego. There's no flies on me if you want to meander about, wasting time worrying about if people care about you or if they don't. You wouldn't want to end up like the asshole above me, would you? Oh and by the way, boy. Now that you've deposited a..what would you call it? "Wank load"? Damn foreigners. Well now that your collective wad has been blown and that's all you're going to attempt to assault my psyche with, I'm afraid you're just going to have to do better, son. Because I still couldn't give a fuck about you.
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Post by Mortus on Feb 6, 2008 2:29:38 GMT -5
Tirades aside, do you think I don't share that very same stance?
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